Wednesday, July 6, 2011

#6 My Favorite Husband

You may wonder why My Favorite Husband would be listed as #6 instead of #1 of My Favorite Things. My list of Favorite Things isn’t exactly listed in order of what I like best. I said I would write about My 12 Favorite things but there is no order to it. I chose to list My Favorite Husband, which by the way makes it sound like I’ve had more than one, I haven’t. My Husband happens to be my Favorite Husband because he is the only husband I have ever had or known and ever hope to have. I listed him as #6 because six was the number of children we wanted to have. Now we didn't talk about that during our courtship time. The subject of children never came up in our conversations while we were dating. It wasn't until Duana was born that Duane had gone to our Sunday School Class in July of 1986 and our teacher at the time was Jeff Roy and his lesson or actually his charge to the group was to raise families for the Lord. Jeff talked about how the Catholic’s and Mormon’s were doing their job to populate the earth but that Christian’s had fallen into the trap of limiting themselves to 2.3 children. Christians were being outnumbered. So after that lesson Duane came home and said he wanted to have six children.

I had just given birth to Duana and was so ecstatic that God blessed us with a baby girl that I was in 7th Heaven!  Or maybe it was Cloud Nine? Here I was holding my baby girl in my arms and feeling like, somebody pinch me! I have a Baby Girl! After having 2 boys and losing a baby the year before that I believe was a boy, and with boys dominating the Vasquez Family, I was in dreamland holding my baby girl!. I could not see the end to being pregnant. I loved being pregnant, I loved the process of childbirth, and I loved the sound of hearing my baby’s first cry, and I absolutely LOVED when the nurse would place my newly born baby in my arms and they were mine to take home. I’m getting ahead of myself here since this is what I’ll write about in my #7 Favorite Things.

I saw no end to my childbearing years so Duane and I were on the same page. Duana was technically my 4th child and I knew more babies were in my future. So you can see how Duane is My Favorite Husband. He wanted a large family as much as I did too. We had settled that we would have six children. I know our friends thought we were crazy and we would get looks. “I” would get looks and as I look back in our photo albums I can see where people thought what was this young teenage girl doing with 3 kids. Our tax dollars are paying for her to raise these kids! Little did they know that I was 28 and had a good husband supporting his house and family.

Duane went to work Monday through Friday and when opportunity arose he worked Overtime. He was a hard worker and he worked just as hard at home too. Even when he had a year he was out of work he took over in the home while I worked a part time job. He did a much better job keeping house And he also homeschooled the kids. One day I came home and he told me that he knew what he wanted to do as a job. He wanted to be A HOUSEWIFE! I told him if he found ME a job that paid 40K a year I’d be glad to work full-time! Well, that never happened. He did take on odd jobs whenever he could. He worked in the Social Security Office he worked The Postal Convention and earned his certificate in Mail Room Management. Among other odd jobs he even worked as an Aide for an Adult Education School. Times were tight that year but God saw us through. If he ever did get depressed about not being able to get a job in his field he never showed it to his family. Duane made it priority and his family was in church every Sunday. His faith in God has never faltered.

Duane is the best husband any woman could ever want! I just celebrated 32 years of married life with him. I know I am more in love with him today than I was the day I married him. Life hasn’t always been smooth every marriage has its ups and downs. Those bumpy times when you wonder will this marriage last? Through it all Duane has loved me every single day. Duane has taken to heart Ephesians 5: 21-33 which is what our wedding ceremony was based upon. “25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…” Yes, My Duane has given up his life for me. He has always wanted to make me happy. He has always stood up for me. Even when I felt unlovable, He loved me. Duane has sacrificed for me and his family. 

When work was looking bleak he took on a job assignment that took him to La Grange, GA for 5 months. I was fortunate enough after that first month he was gone that I was able to visit him for a few days. I couldn’t see going through the summer months without him so I packed up our six kids and drove across the U.S. to be with him. He worked the night shift so I would take the kids out during the day to let him sleep for a few hours. Then he would join us in the afternoons before he took off for work. That was a wonderful summer spent in Georgia.

Another time he was sent off to Saudi Arabia. His first trip there was just for 3 weeks. He went again and he was away for 6 weeks. His last trip there would take him away for 12 weeks which was a difficult decision for him since he knew he would miss some important months in his little boy, Billy’s, life. Little did he know that during this time his father would be diagnosed with stage 4 Hodgkin’s lymphoma. I kept Duane updated on his father’s condition on a daily basis and the emails I sent him turned out to be joined by other family and friends from around the world that were praying for Duane’s Dad. Even from the other side of the world my Dear Husband sent his father a touching email that would help his dad fight for his life. I was proud of my husband. He has such an incredible way with words. I believe he gets it from his maternal grandmother who was a poet and wrote many poems and published a few books of poetry. Duane's latest travels has taken him twice to the North Slope of Alaska. He has been in extreme heat to extreme cold! Believe me, he prefers the 120 degree weather to below freezing! We both prefer the Hot weather.

This brings me to tell you about how my husband, Duane, has supported me in the ministry I work in with Young at Heart at CCV. He didn’t want me to just be taking people places without some sort of meaning to the places we would visit. From the very beginning he was writing Devotionals for me to read during our trips. I believe my favorite one he wrote was for the trip we took to The Kodak Theater. I’ll have to find a copy of it and publish it and add it to this blog. Although my husband has never written me an actual ‘love letter’ he once wrote to me in a card what he loved about me. I think it was for our 30th Anniversary. It was very sweet and I will cherish that the rest of my life. I feel very lucky to have a husband that loves me the way he does.

The main thing that attracted me to him was his love for God. I did feel inferior to his Bible knowledge in the beginning years. As time went on he taught for the High School group, then College group he would teach in our Young Married group. Then we became the “old” Married group and he would teach every now and then. I admired his teaching style and the vast knowledge he had. I felt if I just stayed married to him his knowledge would rub off on me! I did learn so much about the Bible under his teachings. I have to say that he did teach me everything I ever needed to know about the Bible. So he kept his word in Ephesians 5: 26 “to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word…”

Yes, Duane is My Favorite Husband. I have a great respect for my husband and even though I am not commanded to love him I do love, love, love, love Him! God knew what he was doing when he put us together. My confirmation from God came when I discovered that my Birthday is on 7/12 and Duane’s Birthday is 12/7.  7 wonderful children God gave us and 12 because; They Come Cheaper by the Dozen! I feel so very blessed to have Duane in my life and to have the opportunity to grow old with him.


Ephesians 5:”28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

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