My Broken Heart

After spending a week reflecting on what God has been doing in my life I scrapped my original blog. Last Sunday I should have given an update so rather than giving you day by day info I thought I would reflect on the responses I have received from friends that have given me such encouragement and about the time spent in Big Bear.

When my friend Evelyn found out about my health condition she called me and told me about a dream she had. She said that she could see the Holy Spirit moving in and out of my body and then she saw the Lord take my heart and kiss it. Another friend, Jeannie, told me that she sees this all as a Spiritual Battle and that she is praying for me.

Whatever is going on I can feel the prayers of everyone and it is such a wonderful feeling. On Thursday we had the Hymnspiration Festival with Steve and Rachel Ragsdales. Steve sang in the quartet for The Haven of Rest Ministries on the radio for a number of years and still sings with them now and then. Steven’s wife, Rachel, is a wonderful pianist. Rachel shared a story with us that I would like to share with you. Rachel shared how she was decorating her Christmas tree last year and had placed her favorite ornament on the tree. Awhile later she had heard a crash and discovered that her favorite ornament had fallen and broken. The ornament was a ceramic heart shape with a manger scene in the center of it. The heart part had broken into pieces but the manger scene with Mary, Joseph and Baby Jesus had stayed intact. Rachel went on to say that this showed her that there are many people with broken hearts but if Jesus stays together in the middle you can get through most anything. After Rachel shared her story Steve went on to sing, “Don’t Be Surprised.” In my first blog about my health condition I shared that I know God can choose to heal me in a wink of an eye and Steve’s song reinforced that but you know sometimes you feel there are things you must go through in this life so I pretty much felt that “I would be Surprised.” I want to share the words from Steve’s song with you…

Rachel's Broken Heart

Don’t be surprised when God is near
And miracles appear
After all, He hears you call
He hears you pray
Don’t be surprised what God can do
Or when the dreams you’ve dreamed come true
When hopes arise, take this advice
Don’t be surprised

Don’t be surprised when God appears
In your night of tears
And says, “My child, don’t be afraid,
I am here”
Don’t be surprised if in the trial
You start to laugh and start to smile

When fear subsides and joy arrives

Don’t be surprised

The blessings of the Lord should come as no surprise
It’s His tender, loving nature to provide

Don’t be surprised when God is near
And miracles appear
After all, He hears you call
He hears you pray
Don’t be surprised what God can do
Or when the dreams you’ve dreamed come true
When hope arise, take this advice
Don’t be surprised. 

I had some friends that were concerned about me going up to Big Bear. This trip had been planned for several months so I was looking forward to going and my kids had assured me that I could just rest while I was there. I had a couple emails I sent to the doctor to see if there were any concerns about me going. The nurse called me back and said that I should be fine but if I felt any pressure in my chest or pain that doesn’t go away I should immediately go to the ER. Well that was reassuring! LOL

It did turn out to be a wonderful time in Big Bear. One particular morning, and I shared this on Facebook, I felt that I needed to get a picture at the front door. I had been laying in bed looking out the window and I saw the clouds speeding by so I went to get a picture at the front door and I started video taping. The wind was picking up and as I stepped on to the front porch it felt like the Holy Spirit was meeting me. You can watch in this video how the light snow sweeps across the street and it wisks right up to me. It was an incredible feeling. I had wished it would have wrapped itself all around me but later in the day we drove over to the store and as I went to the car a gust of wind with leaves come up to me and wrapped itself all around me nearly blowing me away. I laughed and smiled, looking up and said, “Okay God, I feel you! It was such an incredible feeling! I was expecting to go to Big Bear and to meet God there since I was at such a high elevation. It was beautiful seeing the beauty all around in the mountains and especially to see the snow lightly fall all afternoon on Saturday. It was a wonderful weekend and so glad I was able to share it with some of you on Facebook.

Watch - Feel the Spirit

During the week since I had been in contact with my doctor and telling him I was still experiencing the palpitations he gave me the referrals to have a Stress Test done and the Echocardiogram. Now I feel we’re getting somewhere. I already had my appointment set up with Cardiology to get the heart monitor so it worked out I was able to make my other appointments for the same day on Tuesday, December 10^th. I’ll save those stories for my next blog. Until then, thank you so much for your prayers.

The title of this blog is “My Broken Heart” and not meaning it emotionally. It’s that my heart isn’t functioning properly so something is broken in it. I can laugh and I can smile because I know God is doing something wonderful!